I've always been the type of person who is very independent, strong willed and not very sentimental. Which is different from most of the women I know. Many of the women I know cry quite a bit for reasons I cannot imagine.
It was at this time (while holding Mom in my arms) that I wondered "why I was not crying". Not seeing her or talking much to her in the past 6 months didn't have the same affect on me as did her. All day I wondered to myself and my husband "why didn't I cry?", "why didn't I get as emotional as she did?" My husband said to me, "you do get emotional, you just have different things that you get emotional for." Ok, this made sense to me, but I still wondered more through-out the evening.
I then came accross a blog post by Steve Pavlina called Becoming the Person You Were Meant to Be. What I was reminded of is that I'm not like everybody else. I am unique and never did want to be what everyone else thought of as normal. So reacting in the same way as my Mom, or anyone for that matter, just isn't me.
So what makes me cry?
Amazing how a simple question can be answered within 2 days.
My step-daughter stopped by today to bring me flowers and a Mother Day card. She wrote a special note in it, and I broke down and cried. Here's what she wrote:
Mommy dearest,
I just wanted to take a moment to let you know I love you so much! All the kind, supportive butt kicking lectures really helped me through my life. You always know what to say & how to say it! I know I forget to say it once in a while...but here it is, I love you so very much & thank you for guiding me to be the strong person I am today! I hope I can be just as loving & firm a mother to my own, as you have been to me. The mother you didn't have to be, but compare to in every way! ~Brandie
Knowing that I made a difference in someone's life...that's what makes me cry, touches my heart and soul. And this is also why I will be spending more time, more often, with my Mom.
Happy Mothers Day!
~Khristine